The Troubles of One (Part I)

[Nichos Marr]

Nichos Marr, Jedi Knight had accomplished so much in his time with The Jedi Order. He had fought Sith, learned to fly an X-wing, joined the New Republic. If his parents were alive, he knew they would be proud of him. At least he hoped they would be proud of him.

Every time he held his golden bladed lightsaber memories of the past floated back into his head. He once lived on Rodia, acted for 4 years. Sure, there were some good times. These days, Nichos only seemed to remember the bad. Memories of barfights, bullies, criminals and other bad things popped into his head. The Sith and the Dark Jedi haunted his dreams.

For the past few weeks, insomnia had taken over. He could not sleep for more then an hour a night without being awoken by something. Nichos had assured himself that a Jedi was supposed to have no fear. He didn't feel fear, he felt more of a concern. Concern for where the Galaxy was heading.

In one of his meditation sessions, he peered into the future. It was pretty much clouded, but he did see a few pictures. They were all bad.

Nichos remember when he faced the cave as a Padawan. A vision of his death was brought before him. Had this vision been one of the future? Or was it the Cave's dark side powers trying to fool him? He had been fooled by the Dark Side before. He had never felt a strong temptation for the Dark Side. Nichos had a good heart and was always conscious of his moods. It was rare when he ever felt even a little anger. Nichos had always relied on the Force to calm himself. That's all he had been doing these days. Relying on the Force.

Nichos fought for the Jedi a lot of times. He was a scholar at heart though. When he was a padawan, Nichos thought of himself as a warrior. He was active and always willing. After he became Knighted, his whole life slowed down. He had become more interested in the ways of the Light Side and the Jedi. He had enjoyed teaching his padawan. Nichos was given a whole new perspective on life. He also lost his roguish edge. These days, Nichos Marr wouldn't rush into battle, thinking he would win. Nichos didn't see this as a bad thing. He knew he was maturing. He was 18 years old. His ascension into adulthood had began. Nichos was never one to accept change. Now he wasn't so sure what his life...had become...

OOC: I'd like this to stay closed for now. Thanks.

[Nichos Marr]

Jedi Living Quarters - 12:51 PM

"They viewed the Force as," Nichos read, "life itself. They taught....students...refuse...to...Dark Side."

The Jedi Knight read the book half aloud and half in his mind. He was reading Ancient Jedi: Volume 8. After a few more minutes of reading, he closed the book shut. The dust from the book caused him to sneeze.

Nichos looked at his watch. Only 12:56. He thought to himself. It was shaping up to be a long day. He decided it would be best if he took a day off from everything. Nichos was planning to stay in his room the whole day.

He got up off his bed and trodded across the room to the window. Nichos stared out at the beautiful day on this beautiful planet. Even in his room he felt the life. It was all around him. He felt even the smallest animals' life force. Nichos opened his window and inhaled deeply.

He turned away, back to the bed. Nichos dropped to the floor and reached underneath it. He pulled out a wooden case and blew the dust off of it. His hands slowly opened the case.

[Nichos Marr]

Nichos opened the case and took out his smooth lightsaber. He hadn't used it in a while. Usually in battles, if the Sith could not destroy the Jedi they would take their lightsabers. Nichos had never brought this particular lightsaber into battle. It was the only memory of his past.

During his training, he had constructed a new lightsaber. A blue bladed lightsaber. It had served him well, but his golden lightsaber had a meaning to it. He had a strong connection with it. It wasn't just some weapon. It sometimes became a part of him.

He began to polish it with the edge of his robe. Nichos placed it back in it's case and pushed the case back under the bed.

There was a knock at the door. Nichos turned to it. "Who is it?" He asked.

[ReaperFett]

::Fett knocked on the door of Nichos' room, and waited. Fett had been planning on leaving planet for a while, and wanted to see him before he left. Since Leeloo had been captured, he had been different. Although he had said that nothing was wrong, Fett knew that wasnt true. He knew it was eating him up inside. It was hardly suprising though. The two had barely known each other, and already they were broken up. Fett had decided that the best thing to do was talk to him, try to stop him worrying.

"Who is it?" Came a voice from inside, snapping Fett out of thought. Opening the door, Fett steps inside, and sees Nic kneeling, hands under his bed.

"Just saying hi before I go. You ok?"::

[Nichos Marr]

Nichos got up and sat on his bed.

"Fett..Hi. Am I ok..of course I'm ok. Couldn't be better." Both Fett and Nichos knew that was a lie.

The Knight arched his elbow and ran his left hand through his hair. He usually did this when he was frustrated. Nichos stared at a chair near his desk. The chair began to slide across the room until it stopped before Fett.

"Take a seat if you're not going immediately. By the way, where are you going?"

[ReaperFett]

::Fett smiles, and looks down at the chair

"First comes Telekenisis, then comes laziness"

He takes the seat, and turns to Nic.

"I have to go to Coruscant, pick up Nikit, hes been helping out over there" Fett says, before his face turns more sombre

"Listen, you cant go on like this. You are keeping all this bottled up, it isnt healthy. You need to let it out"::

[Nichos Marr]

"Let what out Master Fett?" Nichos truly tried to make his facial expression clueless. He couldn't even with the aid of the Force.

"I failed myself..and Leeloo" Nichos buried his face into his hands. He wasn't crying, it was more of distress.

"That damn Viscera sent those two TIE Devils at me. He made his escape. I know where he is...But how would I or anyone be able to save them? I don't see it possible." Nichos choked out the words.

[ReaperFett]

::"OK, then I failed her for not even being there. I didnt know, couldnt have done anything. Nor could you. You havent failed anyone"::

[Nichos Marr]

"Yes..well I still feel bad for not doing anything."

Nichos sighed and raised his head out of his hands. He rubbed his eyes and began to pace back and forth. He had to calm down a lot these days. There was a lot of things that were influencing him. He knew he had to overcome them. He was a Knight, just because he lost a sister didn't mean he'd stop protecting others.

"Why do you do this Fett? It seems that the whole galaxy is plagued by darkness. We can't save everyone. There's so much anger and hate. Being a Jedi is harder then most think. Sith and Dark Jedi do what they will freely. Most of the time we aren't even there to stop them. There's always that beacon of hope, but it seems to be fading through my eyes."

[ReaperFett]

::"Lets see. Fame, riches, women.."

Fett looks at Nic, and realisees that that was a bad thing to say. He slowly stands up, and puts a hand on Nics shoulder.

"Listen, by being a Jedi, you are doing what every man with any decency in the universe would want to do- help people. You have a gift, more than most, even more than me in some places. You can make a difference. You cant let other things get you down"::

[Nichos Marr]

"I understand Master. I truly do. But why do the Sith become Sith? How could they commit such terrible acts on others? They are conscious of what they do. Yet they seem to take pleasure in it."

[ReaperFett]

Ive told you before, call me Fett, or Ash, or something like that, but not master. And if I knew why they do it, the world would be a better place

[Nichos Marr]

"Alright..Fett. Sometimes things seem so hopeless. Have you ever felt as if the whole Galaxy was turning on you? Like nothing would ever work out again. It seems to be my mood as of late."

Nichos cleared his throat.

"I don't know why I'm telling you this. You probably have your own troubles to deal with."

[ReaperFett]

things feel hopeless? I was once trapped in the middle of knowhere on Coruscant, on the run from about a hundred cultist, all trying to kill me. When it got to the third week of that, you felt worse then that.

I do know what you're saying. I wish I could say a way to stop that feeling, but only you can.

And no matter what my troubles, Im here for you. Id rather help a friend than worry about my problems

[Nichos Marr]

"Well thanks Fett. I do really appreciate you talking to me about this. I needed to get this all off my chest."

Nichos smiled meekly. He stood up and walked over to Fett, shaking his hand.

"Good luck on your trip to Coruscant."

[ReaperFett]

yeah, COuscant. Remember, Im always ready to listen

[Nichos Marr]

"Again..Fett..I thank you." Nichos grinned.

[ReaperFett]

::"Yeah, see yas. Ill try to bring back something nice for you"

Fett smiles, and heads for the door::

[Nichos Marr]

"Fett wait!" Nichos stood up straight and smiled. "May the Force be with you."

Nichos' smile broadened. He truly was feeling a lot better after his talk with Master Fett. Nichos would need some more time to think about what he was going to do with his life next.

Nichos Marr controlled his own life. Fate and destiny were two things he did not believe in. They meant nothing to him. This was why he barely ever looked into the future.

[Nichos Marr]

A few minutes after Fett left, Nichos sat back down on his bed. He stared up at the ceiling, resting his head on the pillow. It was as if he could see right through. He could see the bright sky, the mynock flocks.

He sighed deeply. He had to get out more. Ever since he had become a Knight he trapped himself in his room, or the temple. Visits to the bar had been less frequant. All these thoughts presented themselves before Nichos. Of course, he was too tired to think. Nichos dared to shut one eye. The other followed. The Young Jedi fell into a deep sleep.